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Anke’s father is abusive to her brother and sister. But not to her. Because, to him, she is like furniture— not even worthy of the worst kind of attention. Then Anke makes the school volleyball team. She loves feeling her muscles after workouts, an ache that reminds her she is real. Even more, Anke loves the confidence that she gets from the sport. And as she learns to call for the ball on the court, she finds a voice she never knew she had. For the first time, Anke is making herself seen and heard, working toward the day she will be able to speak up loud enough to rescue everyone at home— including herself.

• Sales Rank: #317573 in Books
• Published on: 2010-02-23
• Released on: 2010-02-23
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 8.22" h x .94" w x 5.47" l, .60 pounds
• Binding: Paperback
• 368 pages

Review
Incendiary, devastating, yet in total offering empowerment and hope, Chaltas s poems leave an indelible mark. "Publishers Weekly", starred review

A harder read than it seems, but worth it. "Kirkus Reviews"

?Incendiary, devastating, yet?in total?offering empowerment and hope, Chaltas's poems leave an indelible mark.? ?"Publishers Weekly", starred review

?A harder read than it seems, but worth it.? ?"Kirkus Reviews"

"Incendiary, devastating, yet - in total - offering empowerment and hope, Chaltas's poems leave an indelible mark." - "Publishers Weekly", starred review

"A harder read than it seems, but worth it." - "Kirkus Reviews"

About the Author
As a teenager Thalia Chaltas wanted to do everything, and she envied people who knew without question what their life goal was. Thalia did preliminary training to be a kinesiologist, a helicopter pilot, and a fire fighter, and has at times been a bus driver, a ropes course instructor, and a contralto in an a capella group. Along the way she has played lots of volleyball, written poetry, and collected children’s books. And eventually, that anvil fell from the sky and she realized writing was what all this previous intensive training was for.

She has kept every poem she has ever written – except one. Because she can’t find it.

Thalia lives in California with her daughter. Because I Am Furniture is her first novel.

Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
I am always there.
But they don’t care if I am
because I am furniture.

I don’t get hit
I don’t get fondled
I don’t get love
because I am furniture.

Suits me fine.


When the garage door goes up
he’s home.

We close up conversation
and scuttle off like crabs
each to our room—
Shut the door.
Shut the door.
Shut the door.

Mom alone in the kitchen
where she should be

before the garage door goes down
and we are locked in hell.


Dinner.

He knocked Darren onto the linoleum.

I don’t remember his arm swing,
just Darren and his chair—
eight tangled limbs on the floor.

No reason that I could see.

But my father picked up his reasons and his
plate and went
to eat
in the living room.

Darren picked up his chair and himself and we
are now eating
in customary ice-age silence.


When I was much younger
Yaicha and Darren
would point at my nose
and say,

“You don’t look like us
your nose is different
you don’t belong.”

Yaicha and Darren
told me that I was
the mailman’s child,

and I got so angry,
stalking away,
hot steam in my ribs.

Yaicha and Darren
told me that I was
the mailman’s child

and now I am thinking
how wonderful it would be
to have
the mailman as
my father.


My mom.

At times I still want to
sigh,
curl into her,
nourish in her motherness,
especially
when she wears that
old suede jacket that
smells of fall leaves, like
the pliable leather armchair
left outside on the back porch.

But she doesn’t welcome that.
Maybe I am not that young anymore.

And when he is there
all her motherness
has to be
spent on
him.


Oh, yay
charity day
visiting Angeline the Wimp.

I see her often enough at school.
Don’t want to visit her house.

Since her dad
left her and her mousy mother
for some bouncy secretary in Texas
mom and I
are here
to
touch base, be friendly.
Our moms met way back when we were
in preschool.

Angeline irritates me—
she’s delusional,
terrified,
weak.

the ocean has “man-eating seaweed”

the garden has “corn-barfing worms”

the fancy sound system has “thought-tracking speakers.”

I didn’t choose to be friends with her.

Angeline doesn’t
have a father around

and my mom says she
really
needs one.

Maybe.

But
not
like
mine.



Scrubbing my volleyball knee pads
while I’m in the shower,
hot water,
way too much soap,
but, man,
three days of preseason training
on the sly
collected a hell of a stink.

The foam won’t dry out overnight.

My knees will probably
froth in soap bubbles
if I dare set foot in tryouts tomorrow.


First day.
Ninth grade.
High school.

Honking in the parking lot,
upperclassmen back smacking,
squeals of recognition,
a grimly nodding principal.

I’m supposed to feel something more than just
rattled
by the sheer number of people in the halls, right?
Scared?

Except that I’ve been in and out of
this building
a bunch of times for years—
Yaicha’s musicals,
Darren’s debate team.

I learned my classrooms from the map,
and I just spent whole days going to volleyball
training here,
so I kind of get it already.

I like school.

Not scared.

But excited in that
jiggering-on-too-much-hot-sauce
kind of way
that it’s time to
step out
of my old framework,
raw and amorphous,
to become something I’ve never thought of
before.

After school is a different story.
Volleyball tryouts.


I wasn’t going to do it.
Even though I crave it
I wasn’t supposed to
try out
because
my father said,
“Competition is dangerous for
a young girl’s mind.”

But I already like the girls from preseason
training.
And that tenth-grader Rona saw me
growing roots
outside the locker room
dangling my new volleyball sneakers
bought with my own money
in secret.

Rona looked me in the eye.

“You are going to put on some shorts, right?”

and as she steered me
through the splintered wood door
she told me
about some player last year
who tried out with mittens on
to protect her nylon nails.

Most helpful customer reviews

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Highly recommend!
By Rosie Gross
A fantastic read! My daughter picked up this book quite randomly, and both of us were hooked on the first page we read. She liked the book so much she asked for her own copy. I had never read a book in this format before, but the prose worked beautifully. I can't imagine the book would be nearly as touching and realistic without this format.

8 of 9 people found the following review helpful.
Ultimately Empowering and Hopeful
By Mint910
Books written in verse are interesting. You would automatically think they would be easier to write because there are less words etc but I think they are actually harder to write. Having to get across just as much information and emotion with fewer words, each word holds greater meaning. I think this book does a wonderful job of telling a very emotional and important story with so few words.

I thought this would be really hard to read, and while it was it was also an empowering and hopeful book. To watch a young girl find her voice and not be afraid to use it, it was powerful. It was also interesting to see inside of this house, with all the terror and abuse that happens that no one ever say anything or ask for help. That's just the way the family was and they would rather deal with it that privately than make a change to their family. I thought the author did a great job of revealing the mentality of this family and made it easy to understand and believe.

I haven't read many books in verse and I still struggle with them a little bit. At least for me, sometimes things don't come off as clearly as they could, I get the basic idea but sometimes wonder if I'm always understanding everything correctly. Maybe that's just me! All in all a powerful and important book that really packs an emotional punch.

4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Amazing Debut Novel!
By Emereld2
I picked Because I Am Furniture off a cart of books being processed this afternoon and started paging through it. I was a little put off by the "in verse" style, but after reading the book jacket, decided to give it a try.

Wow. Although this is a heavy subject, the book is easy to read. I am in awe of Chalta's storytelling; every word counts and there is no filler. We are in Anke's head, and it's not an easy place to be. She is vaguely aware of the abuse her father piles on her mother and two older siblings, but the family is in a conspiracy of silence. She understands that it's pathetic to feel left out of the abuse, but one can't help what he or she feels. Being spared means being ignored, being ignored means being worthless.

Entering high school, she defies her father by joining the volleyball team. This decision has unforeseen consequences on the entire family. Once Anke discovers her sense of self-worth, she becomes a force to be reckoned with.

Highly recommended!

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Fresh from a ride on a Nazi submarine, Indiana Jones is persuaded by a beautiful missionary to search for her missing father in Mongolia. Professor Angus Starbuck has discovered a dinosaur bone in the Gobi Desert. But unlike other such discoveries, this bone isn’t ancient! As Indy crosses from China through a treacherous mountain pass into Outer Mongolia, he runs afoul of the region’s fiercest warlords. Meanwhile, the world’s last innocent people, dwelling in a Stone Age paradise, are poised on the brink of destruction. Suddenly Indiana Jones is dueling wild dogs and bloodthirsty killers in a desperate effort to save the most historic discovery of the twentieth century: the last living triceratops!

• Sales Rank: #173421 in Books
• Brand: McCoy, Max
• Published on: 1996-02-01
• Released on: 1996-02-01
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 6.80" h x .80" w x 4.00" l, 1.00 pounds
• Binding: Mass Market Paperback
• 304 pages

About the Author
Max McCoy is an award-winning journalist and author whose novels include The Sixth Rider and Sons of Fire. He lives in Pittsburgh, Kansas.

Most helpful customer reviews

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Raider of Jones's Books
By Jason A. Tselentis
I'm only halfway through this book, but I am absolutely hooked. McCoy captures everything about Indiana Jones that we know and love, and puts it within the pages of this novel. Moreover, there are a lot of characters we read about that also made their way into the major motion pictures. (I won't spoil who they are.)

I'm giving this book four stars because some of the action scenes are really really drawn out. Sure, they're long in the movies, but here in a book, some of them seem overdone. Still, they are done well, but I feel like I could move through the book quicker if I didn't have to follow thick descriptions of how Jones gets out of one mess after the other.

Nevertheless, that's what makes Jones such a great hero, right? Getting out of all those messes.

What I appreciate most is how McCoy succeeds in capturing Jones's voice. The things Jones says, his verbal reactions to situations and in response to other characters, all feel right. Whether it's a short quip or a long lecture, McCoy makes Jones's words seem authentic.

My only regret? Not finding this and McCoy's other books sooner. But now that I have a set of four from McCoy's series, I know how I'm spending my summer.

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Dinosaurs??
By King Edward
Don't let the title fool you, the dinosaur aspect of this book is well done. Great, classic Indy book.

2 of 2 people found the following review helpful.
The Prehistoric Present
By tvtv3
After examining what appears to be the horn of triceratops that has not been fossilized, Indy sets out for China and Outer Mongolia in search of a living dinosaur. He's joined on his quest with a nun with an attitude named Joan Starbuck whose father, Angus Starbuck, has gone missing looking for dinosaur fossils in Mongolia; and Walter Granger, a seasoned big-game hunter and explorer who has joined Indy on past adventures. Upon arriving in Shanghai, the party is joined by a young Chinese man named Wu Han after Indy saves him from a lifetime of servitude to the notorious gangster Lao Che. Their journey into the wilderness brings them into contact with the descendant of Genghis Khan, the Black (False) Lama (think the anti-Dali Lama), and perhaps the last living triceratops in existence.

The book is framed with a substory about Indy trying to recover a crystal skull stolen from him by the Nazis with the assistance of Rene Belloq. The book also includes an afterward that discusses Roy Chapman Andrews (who discovered the first fossilized dinosaur eggs in China), the American Museum of Natural History, the legendary allergorhai-horhai, and the coelacanth.

INDIANA JONES AND THE DINOSAUR EGGS may not be the most original action-adventure story, but it isn't too bad. It does a good job of keeping true to the character of Indiana Jones and following the canon and continuity of the series. I enjoyed the introduction of Wu Han and Lao Che who figure prominently in both the INDIANA JONES AND THE EMPEROR'S TOMB video game as well as the beginning of the INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM movie. I also liked the connection to Rene Belloq in the introduction of the book as well as the mention of Joseph Campbell. An excellent read for fans of Indiana Jones.

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This book promotes proper installation methods for cut and cover pipelines. The emphasis is on proper selection and compaction of embedment soils. Second edition contains new chapters, new material, more illustrations, updated information, and links to online resources. Topics include: uncompacted bedding best compaction methods uniform soil descriptions soil migration native flowable fill flowable fill at pipe structure junctions flowable fill in pipe haunches inspection check lists

• Sales Rank: #1368492 in Books
• Published on: 2015
• Binding: Hardcover
• 640 pages

Most helpful customer reviews

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
A Major Overhaul Of The 1996 Edition
By Mark Wilkerson
Pipeline Installation 2.0 is a major overhaul of his 1996 edition. This book has twice as many pages as the first edition and includes research results from a recently conducted major pipeline project. This book is essential for pipe installers, pipe designers, geotechnical engineers and engineering geologists.

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
This is THE go-to book on pipeline installation- Tons of topics, lively illustrations, the latest technical updates & research
By InformedCitizen
Pipeline Installation 2.0 is the second edition of Pipeline Installation, which was first published in 1996. The 2015 Pipeline Installation 2.0 edition includes new chapters, more illustrations, updated content, additional topics, and links to online resources. The second edition also includes case histories related to the author’s experiences. It covers the fundamentals of pipe-soil interaction as related to the construction of a buried pipeline. All types of pipe are discussed. From unloading the pipe at the construction site to final testing for acceptance, each step in the installation sequence is reviewed in detail.

Proper selection of soil type and compaction level for the soil support system for both rigid and flexible pipe is discussed, along with the appropriate soil testing requirements and standards. Inspection check lists are included throughout the book for use by on-site inspectors as a guide for proper installation procedures. The book emphasizes that a buried pipe is a soil-pipe interaction problem. The solution is the best combination of pipe strength and soil support that results in an efficient, economical, and enduring pipeline. Then, the pipeline must be constructed as designed to be successful. This book promotes proper installation practices.

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Easily a 5 star book! Great information on soil compaction/density.
By Dustin Langston
This is a wonderful book. I am a pipeline engineer and am working with installation/burial instructions frequently. I purchased this book back in June and just recently finished it in August. It has great information with fun illustrations. Chapters 4 & 5 on soil density and compaction are the best I have found in any book, and chapter 15 on flowable fill is great current information that is very important as many pipelines are using flowable fill for haunch support. Easily a 5 star book!

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Unfortunately, very few people these days talk about real values in life. What we stand for in life, and are we living up to these values are worth pondering. Are our aspirations in tune with the real purpose of life? It is the values that remind us often what to aspire in life. Most people value life and its achievements from the perspective of wealth and richness, but do not recognize trust, honesty, and contentment as forward looking attributes that help in overall satisfaction. Giving importance to external growth leaving behind inner development often leads to unbalance in life devoid of overall satisfaction. Much of the troubles in this world are that true values of life have narrowed down, skewed, ignored and misunderstood. This book deliberates different aspects of life in terms of personal, moral, spiritual, family and social values and how these can enrich life and fill its purpose. A wide range of topics include How to live an easier life; Thoughts on simplifying life; Virtues of Integrity; Mistakes we generally make; Control on impulsive mind; Being Successful in life; Benefits from silence; Communication with inner self; Creating love for others; How to think positive; How moral values get reinforced; Belief in natural justice; What is spirituality; Understanding self; How to find God; What does death mean to us; Good family values; Being part of whole universe; Universal brotherhood; Towards developing good values. Attempt has been made to describe large issues that are outcome of misdirected value system, and how best a person can move ahead in life by focusing on core values. The idea of writing this book is to facilitate readers to pause and think about what they aspire, and are these aspirations in tandem with broad purpose in life.

• Sales Rank: #4075943 in Books
• Published on: 2010-04-23
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 9.02" h x .70" w x 5.98" l, 1.01 pounds
• Binding: Paperback
• 312 pages

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There is NOTHING boring about being a kid, but one little girl is going to have to prove it in this anything-but-boring eBook with audio from comedian Michael Ian Black.

Just when a little girl thinks she couldn’t possibly be more bored, she stumbles upon a potato who turns the tables on her by declaring that children are boring. But this girl isn’t going to let a vegetable tell her what’s what, so she sets out to show the unimpressed potato all the amazing things kids can do. Too bad the potato is anything but interested….
This tongue-in-cheek twist on a familiar topic is sure to entertain anyone who’s ever been bored—or had to hear about someone else being bored—and is filled with comedian Michael Ian Black’s trademark dry wit, accompanied by charismatic illustrations from newcomer Debbie Ridpath Ohi.

• Sales Rank: #852562 in eBooks
• Published on: 2012-09-04
• Released on: 2012-09-04
• Format: Kindle eBook

From Booklist
When a wispy-haired girl, bored out of her mind, comes across a potato, she finds he is bored, too. She would be happy to hang out with him, but the potato thinks “kids are boring.” The little girl attempts to prove him wrong by showing him all the fun things kids can do, like “spin around in circles until we get so dizzy we almost throw up” or pretend to be a famous ballerina or a lion tamer. But our spud is not impressed. Even when the girl hilariously throws on a potato costume, he remains steadfastly ho-hum. Ohi’s digitally created girl is a real charmer as she skips and twirls across the pages; the fantasy elements, rendered in pale blue and set on a crisp white background, nicely contrast the two full-colored characters, and the potato humorously pops up in the fantasies from time to time—for example, as a monkey’s coconut or as the head on a snowman. This is a super silly story. But, hey, at least it’s not boring. Preschool-Grade 2. --Ann Kelley

Review
I’m Bored

By Michael Ian Black and illustrated by Debbie Ridpath Ohi

(SSBFYR; ISBN 9781442414037; September 2012)



It looks to be the ultimate ennui smackdown: a bored-out-of-her-gourd kid vs. an equally jaded potato. Then the potato accuses the girl of being the source of its boredom. “What are you talking about?” demands the feisty pigtailed human. “Kids are fun!” “Prove it,” says the potato. And almost as fast as you can say “reverse psychology,” the girl shows that she is in fact a wellspring of fun: playing games, doing “ninja kicks” and other acrobatics, turning ordinary objects into fantastic props (an overturned laundry basket becomes a snow-capped mountain in her imagination), and engaging in pretend play that encompasses everything from being a ballerina to... a potato. “Boring,” responds the potato each time, before the girl storms off. But not to worry: what goes around comes around. Black (A Pig Parade Is a Terrible Idea) keeps this simple concept funny all the way through its final, LOL zinger. Debut illustrator Ohi’s minimalist, scraggly digital drawings are anything but boring, and speak volumes about irritation, desperation, and disdain. Ages 3–8.

--Publishers Weekly, July 9, 2012, *STAR

* "Black (A Pig Parade Is a Terrible Idea) keeps this simple concept funny all the way through its final, LOL zinger. Debut illustrator Ohi’s minimalist, scraggly digital drawings are anything but boring, and speak volumes about irritation, desperation, and disdain."--Publishers Weekly, starred review

I'M BORED
Author: Black, Michael Ian
Illustrator: Ohi, Debbie Ridpath

Review Issue Date: August 1, 2012
Online Publish Date: July 22, 2012
Publisher:Simon & Schuster
Pages: 40
Price (Hardcover ): $16.99
Publication Date: September 18, 2012
ISBN (Hardcover ): 978-1-4424-1403-7
Category: Picture Books

A kid and a tuber dispute what is and isn’t boring, to no particular avail.
The beginning’s fun. A scowling, cartoon-style girl with a large head and sideways pigtails flops from one dramatic posture to another, complaining, “I’m bored. / Bored. Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. / I’m so BORED!” White space surrounds her. From nowhere, a potato appears. This girl must really live in white-space-land, because she’s initially thrilled: “Hey! A potato!” Then she rejects it and tosses it upwards. It falls, bonks her on the head and sits on the ground. “I’m bored,” announces the suddenly anthropomorphic potato in one of two genuinely funny moments. Previously unable to entertain herself, the girl labors to prove she’s interesting. She demonstrates cartwheels, ninja kicks and imagination games—lion taming; dragons and swords; forcing the potato to walk a pirate-ship plank—all of which Ohi sketches in pale blue. The surly potato stubbornly remains bored. Their argument ends without satisfaction or vindication; the girl yells, mouth wide and black like in Peanuts, and departs in frustration. There’s one more funny moment—not the appearance of a random flamingo (flamingos being, inexplicably, the potato’s only interest in life), but the flamingo’s closing complaint. Yep: “I’m bored.” Turnabout’s fair play, but the whole piece feels like a smarmy lesson about how annoying it is when someone insists on boredom.
Ironically, boring. (Picture book. 3-5)
Kirkus Reviews, August 1, 2012

BLACK, Michael Ian. I’m Bored. illus. by Debbie Ridpath Ohi. 40p. S & S. Sept. 2012. Tr $16.99. ISBN 978-1-4424-1403-7; ebook $12.99. ISBN 978-1-4424-5325-8.
K-Gr 2–Languishing on the floor of her bedroom in a funk, a girl is momentarily distracted by a potato, but then laments, “What am I supposed to do with a potato?!!” In a funny twist, the testy tater complains about being stuck hanging out with a child. The youngster’s ire is raised and she enthusiastically takes up the challenge of proving that children are anything but dull. Her cartwheels, ninja kicks, imaginary lion-taming adventures, and proclamations that “Kids can do ANYTHING!!!” all fail to impress the blank-faced spud, who delivers the same verdict–“Boring…Snoring.” In the last laugh, the potato does get its comeuppance. Ohi’s captivating, digitally created illustrations are full of wit and charm. The girl appears as a blue swirling cyclone with pigtails flying, hands sticking out, and a pink heart as she spins in circles. The text size and layout also keep pace with her frenetic antics. Quirky and fun to read aloud, this book is a sure antidote for cases of ennui.–Linda Ludke, London Public Library, Ontario, Canada
SLJ, September 2012

I’m Bored

By Michael Ian Black and illustrated by Debbie Ridpath Ohi

(SSBFYR; ISBN 9781442414037; September 2012; Fall Catalog)

“I’m Bored,” by Michael Ian Black, stars a little girl and a potato. As the story begins, the girl tells us she is bored. A potato is the only thing in sight. But, as she says while throwing the potato up in the air, “what can you do with a potato?” The potato falls, strikes her on the head, then declares, “I’m bored!” The talking spud claims it’s bored because it only has a little kid to play with.” (It would rather have a flamingo.) Offended, the girl begins explaining to the potato why children are fun: they can play games, walk on their hands, pretend and so on. To each suggestion the potato replies with one word: “Boring.” (Once, its response varies: “Snoring.”) Unable to convince the potato of her own worth, the girl walks off in a huff. Enter a flamingo, static and probably plastic, minus a lawn, just as the potato is minus its couch. (It won’t matter, by the way, if children don’t get this joke.) The potato is excited to meet it, only to be told by the stiff pink bird: “I’m bored.” The implication is clear: Those who cannot or choose not to move, to play, to think for themselves are always bored and are, in turn, boring to be with. Could this mean you? Your friends? Your parents? Black wisely avoids the temptation to point fingers, leaving it up to his young readers to make that call. Black is a comedian and actor (“Stella,” “The State”) when not writing children’s books (“A Pig Parade Is a Terrible Idea”), and he tells his story in sprightly fashion. The illustrator Debbie Ridpath Ohi convincingly draws a child full of life, a potato full of—well, potatotude, and computer drawings that look just like good old-fashioned linocuts. Her smart cartoony artwork matches Black’s perfect comic timing, making for a fun ride that should leave you amused, perhaps pensive, and no longer bored.

--New York Times Book Review, September 16, 2012

  Michael Ian Black "tells his story in sprightly fashion. The illustrator Debbie Ridpath Ohi convincingly draws a child full of life, a potato full of—well, potatotude, and computer drawings that look just like good old-fashioned linocuts. Her smart cartoony artwork matches Black’s perfect comic timing, making for a fun ride that should leave you amused, perhaps pensive, and no longer bored." (New York Times Book Review)

"Ohi’s captivating, digitally created illustrations are full of wit and charm.... Quirky and fun to read aloud, this book is a sure antidote for cases of ennui." (School Library Journal)

A Notable Children's Book Of 2012 (The New York Times Sunday Book Review)

"[Michael Ian] Black, a comedian, has become a fine children's book storyteller.... Readers will not be bored." (The New York Times Book Review)

"Beautifully written by Michael Ian Black and gorgeously illustrated by Debbie Ridpath Ohi... It has the courage to go unfashionably old-school and suggest that our imagination, not our gadgets, is the only cure [for boredom].... Both the writing and the illustrations are fearless." (The Globe & Mail)

"Fans of Mo Willems’ Elephant and Piggie series will delight in the latest book by American comedian Michael Ian Black, illustrated by Toronto graphic artist Debbie Ridpath Ohi. Echoing Willems, Black’s story is constructed around the dialogue of an unlikely couple, in this case a small girl and a potato. The text is perfectly complemented by Ohi’s quirky minimalist drawings." (Quill & Quire)

"Sometimes a picture book gets it just right. And by 'it,' I mean clever concept, smart execution and all-around child-friendly vibe. It’s rare for one of those picture books to have been written by a so-called celebrity author—someone who made a name for him or herself in Hollywood and then decided to write children’s books—but Michael Ian Black has proven to be the exception to the rule." (Julie Danielson Kirkus Reviews blog)

"Black...tells his story in sprightly fashion. The illustrator Debbie Ridpath Ohi convincingly draws a child full of life, a potato full of — well, potatotude, and computer drawings that look just like good old-fashioned linocuts. Her smart cartoony artwork matches Black’s perfect comic timing, making for a fun ride that should leave you amused, perhaps pensive, and no longer bored." (The New York Times Sunday Book Review)

"Genuinely funny moments.... [The girl] demonstrates cartwheels, ninja kicks and imagination games—lion taming; dragons and swords; forcing the potato to walk a pirate-ship plank—all of which Ohi sketches in pale blue."--Kirkus Reviews

About the Author

Michael Ian Black

Michael Ian Black is a writer, comedian, and actor who currently appears on Another Period, The Jim Gaffigan Show, and Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp. He created and starred in many television series, including Michael and Michael Have Issues, Stella, and The State. He wrote the screenplay for the film Run, Fatboy, Run and wrote and directed the film Wedding Daze. Michael regularly tours the country as a stand-up comedian and is the bestselling author of the book My Custom Van (and 50 Other Mind-Blowing Essays That Will Blow Your Mind All Over Your Face), the memoir You’re Not Doing It Right, and the children’s books Chicken Cheeks, The Purple Kangaroo, A Pig Parade Is a Terrible Idea, I’m Bored, Naked!, and Cock-a-Doodle-Doo-Bop. Michael lives in Connecticut with his wife and two children.

Debbie Ridpath Ohi

Debbie Ridpath Ohi is the author of Where Are My Books?. Her illustrations also appear in Sea Monkey and Bob, written by Aaron Reynolds; I’m Bored (New York Times Notable Book) and Naked!, written by Michael Ian Black; as well as ten Judy Blume chapter books and middle grade titles. For more info, visit DebbieOhi.com or @InkyElbows on Twitter.

Most helpful customer reviews

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
M.I.B.
By Benjamin J. Wagar
Look. We've all been watching our kids, or with nieces or nephews, or someone else's kids and heard them mumble these two words. This book, is a subtle reminder to them that it is much better to be a kid then a potato - though some potatoes would disagree. This is one of the only books my 18 month old son will sit through from beginning to end - though I'm sure the intricacies of the story are lost on him. Long live M.I.B.

1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
MIB, you're the best
By Nicolio
I read "You're Not Doing It Right" when my kid was 2, and your honest despair SANG to my dark soul. She's cooler now (just like you promised) but my tendency to run weekends like a circus has caused super early case of "I'm Bored" during seconds of downtime. I will use this fun book to teach her that she, in fact, is boring, and really needs to just get it together. She doesn't get the lesson yet, but we both like the flamingo.

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Daughter enjoyed the book but a bit short
By Anant
My 6 year old seemed to enjoy the book but she finished it in less than 10 minutes. Not really worth the 5 bucks spent.

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Dearly Departed by David Bottrell and Jessie Jones.

• Sales Rank: #467896 in Books
• Brand: Brand: Dramatists Play Service, Inc.
• Published on: 1998-01
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 7.25" h x 5.50" w x .25" l, .20 pounds
• Binding: Paperback
• 72 pages

Features

• Used Book in Good Condition

Most helpful customer reviews

0 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
Very Funny
By Jean-Remy Monnay
Highly recommanded! I started reading this play and couldn't put it down until I finished it.

0 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
This is a horrible play, it has adultery
By Twynkle
This is a horrible play, it has adultery, domestic violence in front of children, alcoholism, degrading remarks. I read the entire thing and never smiled once. The part where they make fun of the woman who keeps miscarrying is in really poor taste and then there is the woman with 7 kids with 7 different fathers who is marrying a man that hates kids. I would give this a zero if I could.

14 of 15 people found the following review helpful.
Delightful and thoroughly enjoyable!
By A Customer
This is a hilarious look at the life through the lives of a quirky Southern family who just can't seem to come to grips with the passing of "Daddy Bud", the patriarch of the family. The characters are full of spunk and vigor, not to mention the dialogue, which abounds with true laugh-out-loud humor. From the holier-than-thou Aunt Marguerite to the above-it-all widow Raynelle, this play is a definate winner!

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• Published on: 1987-03
• Original language: English
• Binding: Paperback

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When kittypet Tiny crosses paths with some wild forest cats defending their territory, he is left with scars—and a bitter, deep-seated grudge. As his reputation grows among the strays and loners that live in the dirty brick alleyways of Twolegplace, he changes his name to Scourge and puts everything about his old life behind him—except his deadly desire for revenge.

• Sales Rank: #22406 in Books
• Brand: HarperCollins
• Published on: 2008-06-24
• Released on: 2008-06-24
• Original language: English
• Number of items: 1
• Dimensions: 7.44" h x .34" w x 5.00" l, 1.10 pounds
• Binding: Paperback
• 112 pages

From School Library Journal
Grade 4–7—This adaptation provides a look at the origins of the cat Scourge, the evil leader of the Bloodclan. Tiny is a fearful house kitten who is the runt of the litter. Once he strikes out on his own, though, he renames himself Scourge and vows to take revenge on the wild forest cats who once attacked him. Though drawn and laid out in a manga style, the illustrations are more detailed than typical manga drawings and effectively bring out the cats' personalities and characters. This is not a cuddly animal tale: there are some vicious attacks, one ending in a death.—Lisa Goldstein, Brooklyn Public Library, NY
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

About the Author

Erin Hunter is inspired by a love of cats and a fascination with the ferocity of the natural world. In addition to having great respect for nature in all its forms, Erin enjoys creating rich mythical explanations for animal behavior. She is also the author of the bestselling Seekers and Survivors series.

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0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Scourge is my favorite villain from Warriors
By P.W.
Scourge is my favorite villain from Warriors. To know more about is past life is great. I absolutely loved The Rise of Scourge. The drawings are correct and even if the 'manga' is small, we learn a lot about Scourge/Tiny. Scourge is not just an heartless cat who enjoys killing : He's a great leader who protects his clanmate. He wasn't lucky to have friends to help him or faith for StarClan to guide him, like Firestar. He became the best he could all alone. I love him even more now that I know how hard his life was. Thank you Erin Hunter.

0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
(Spoiler warning) it is awsome ,it tells about Scourge, leader of BloodClan , as a kit , with his name being Tiny back then when
By SilverStar 6042
(Spoiler warning) it is awesome ,it tells about Scourge , leader of BloodClan , as a kit , being bullied by his brother and sister , socks and ruby, Scourge's name being Tiny back when he was a kittypet ,you go through is journey of him from cute adorable kitten to a menacing leader with a sad back story.

41 of 44 people found the following review helpful.
Amazing Chronology
By Reedfrost
This is a great chronology of the life of Scourge, or, more accurately, his rise to power. It details how exactly he did it, as well as focusing upon his rough early life. The art is very good, and I enjoyed watching him become the cat that was feared by all. As with all Warriors manga books, it was a little short, but I believe that the art and enjoyable story line well make up for it.

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